Tuesday, September 9, 2008
guilty mommy moment
I had a guilty mommy moment yesterday. I've had them before but not to this extent. For some reason, I was just in a weird mood yesterday. Charlie is getting very proficient at using his scream to communicate and these two things did not mix well. I was sitting at the computer, reading blogs. Charlie was standing beside my chair whining. He loves the computer so I have to limit his time with it for fear that he will mess something up. I kept telling him to wait just a minute. But, of course, the screaming starts because I'm not picking him up so that he can have his "computer time". After a few minutes of this, I guess I had just had enough and turned and yelled at him to stop screaming and wait a minute. He just looked at me with those brown puppy dog eyes, whined a little and sat down. He proceeded to play with some of his toys at this point. My heart hurt. I felt awful that I was sitting there, being selfish, and not giving my son what he wanted at that point. And to top it all off, I yelled at him to stop screaming. How hypocritical is that? Sometimes, I have to say his name pretty loud to get his attention when he's screaming but I've never yelled at him like that. I immediately got up and hugged/kissed him and told him I was sorry, not that he cared, being a one year old, but it was necessary for my sake. He was already over it and on to something else. So, after having my guilty mommy moment, I've tried to watch my patience and my temper with him because he shouldn't have to take the brunt of my bad moods. I know I'm not the only one who has these moments and I'm sure there will be more...I mean, I'm only human. But I pray God will give me the patience to stay calm and to watch my tongue, not only with my son but with everyone around me.
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4 comments:
If I've learned anything about being a parent, it's having patience. I feel truly tested as a Mom to keep my sanity and moodiness in check every day. I've definitely had days like yours. Don't beat yourself up too hard. The 2's are creeping up on you, aren't they?
I think all of us moms get a heaping dose of guilt before we even leave the hospital. It doesn't seem to afflict dads as much, but we tend to replay our actions, analyze and second-guess. All of us do make mistakes, but you did the right thing by apologizing, setting things right, and resolving to do better. And isn't that exactly what you want Charlie to do when he makes a mistake?
Thanks for your comment on CW. I'm so glad you got to see it and offered your kind words!
Oh, Melissa, I bet I'll have my share of "guilty mommy moments." I already have so many "guilty wife moments"!
Hi, My name is Michelle. I am Stacy Helms' cousin by marriage. I see the 'Charlie is one' birthday party invitations everytime we go to their house (on the fridge). They are so cute! Did you use photoshop to make them? Did you make the template for the green one or buy it on a disc? Thank you so much.
Michelle
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